1. Book your flight for the wrong year. The #Dophed it’s-2013-but-my-flight-is-for-2014 fiasco will go down in history as one of travel days’ biggest tragedies.
2. Book your flight with an airline named Expedia. It’s pretty hard to find their check in gate.
3. Pack your passport in your checked luggage. Something tells me Kazakhstan customs won’t be wild about you reaching for your duffle.
4. Eat less food because it’s an “off day” and you’re “sitting” all day. No flight attendant/coach/teammate deserves the resulting hanger/fatigue/illness.
5. Overdress/underdress. Either way you’re going to sweat. And, no, I haven’t found the right combination of layers, but when I do, it will revolutionize travel as we know it.
6. Book your flights through Boston on January 26th, 2015. “Thank you for calling our airline hotline, your call will be received by a services agent in the next 43 minutes to six days”
BONUS! Number 7: Freak out and totally lose it when any of the above things occur. Traveling
can be is stressful, it’s a neurological marathon that constantly demands attention and calculation, but, if you’re a cross country skier in the US, travel will inevitably be a huge part of your life. Just like they do on race day, or exam day, or performance day, things are going to go wrong on travel day. I would tell you (and me) to anticipate those things, but you can’t. The rules are different in transience, every change is one you probably haven’t encountered. But that’s what makes a great story, right?
I’ll call you from Asia,